"Your own resolution to success is a bit more important than some other one thing." - Abraham Lincoln
Bianca rose for the sound of pigeons cooing and traffic grumbling at work below. As she yawned and stretched, she contemplated what was waiting for her that particular day.
She felt her motivation slowly drain away each and every deadline and commitment that zipped through her thoughts. As Bianca begun to wither and wilt internally, she remembered the motivation pills she had purchased last week in the Good Value Pharmacy.
There was yellow pills labeled 'Money', pink pills labeled 'Pride', green pills labeled 'Family', purple pills labeled 'Respect' and several ugly grey pills labeled 'Nagging Advice'. The chemist had informed her as he dispensed the pills that some would work for her and some wouldn't normally... he could never tell beforehand which pills would work for which customers. With that advice in mind plus a smile on her lips, Bianca reached for that one she knew will be just right for her...
The most effective things you can do for yourself on your own journey of self discovery is always to work out what drives you. The initial step is to identify your values because they provide the fuel to your motivation and the drive behind anything you do in life. If you value something you will always obtain the motivation and energy to make it happen. If you don't value something, you'll always struggle to obtain the motivation and energy to get it done.
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Your values are exactly what are important to you. These are the broad concepts that guide your decisions in life and form the first step toward your character. Your values also decide how you spend your time. By way of example, if your most important value is health, you will spend your time quite differently from someone whose most important value is career or family.
Values also drive your entire motivation. You won't pursue a strategy unless it relates to something value at some level. Identifying your values lets you kick-start your own motivation, set goals which are appropriate and invest some time on things that you require.
How Your Values Are Formed
Your values result from a number of sources as well as your family, friends, religion, school, teachers, country and the media. They are also shaped without notice in your life by significant emotional events including natural disasters, emotional abuse, global depression or war.
Your values change when you grow and evolve. When you change your values, you will probably change some of your beliefs and in what way you live life.
How To Identify Your Personal Values
Identifying your own personal values helps you to:
- Understand why some issues are a problem for you;
- See why the main things motivate you and others don't; and
- Identify and overcome trouble spots of your life.
For example, assume you've weight issues. You determine your individual values and find that conditioning doesn't even rate a mention within your values. You may have found the reason why you are having weight issues, i.e. conditioning is not something you value. Although this remains the case it'll be very difficult for you to lose weight and gain a greater degree of health and fitness in your life since you will not have any motivation for this.
You can identify your values by asking yourself:
- What is important to me regarding my life, career, relationships etc?
- What would cause me to leave my life, career, relationships, etc?
For those who have an understanding of your values, it is important to see how they affect your motivation.
Your values drive your motivation. In the event you set goals which are aligned with your values, you will have the motivation to help you achieve them. In case you set goals that aren't in line with your values, it'll be an uphill struggle to achieve them.
When you understand your values as well as their impact on how you are currently motivating yourself you will have wonderful insight into the reason why you achieve the results which you do in life. You will also understand how to motivate yourself more effectively in the foreseeable future.
Motivation comes either from the inside you (intrinsic motivation) or from another source (extrinsic motivation).
Extrinsic motivationis given by some factor external for you. It can take the form of inducements (rewards) or punishments. The rewards can be tangible or intangible (including praise).
Intrinsic motivationis evident if you engage in an activity for the own sake without the external incentive. It seems from research done by Albert Bandura that if you might have more self efficacy (belief absolutely need abilities to control your environment) you are more highly intrinsically motivated than others.
As intrinsic motivation could be the only one you can take with them and call upon at any time, it is the most important regarding self motivation.
Intrinsic motivation could be broken down further into 'towards' motivation and 'away from' motivation. 'Towards' motivation is motivation towards something you want and 'away from' motivation is motivation far from something you don't want.
'Away From' Motivation
'Away from' motivation is driven by pain. Pain motivated performance is just not pleasant, produces inconsistent results and disappears in the event the pain is no longer present.
'Away from motivation' does, however, offer you a strong initial motivation to go away from the thing you don't want in your life. A problem with using this type of motivation is you wait until things are bad before you take action to change them. One other issue is that you don't have a target or goal that you're aiming for (just something are running from) and that means you don't tend to achieve results.
Sophia uses 'away from' motivation in relation to her weight. Therefore she is the classic yo yo dieter. Her process goes like this. Sophia looks in the mirror and is aware that she is overweight. She says to herself, 'I wouldn't like to be fat anymore'. She then proceeds a diet to ensure she is no longer fat. (She is moving away from being fat). Sooner or later she looks in the mirror and sees that she looks fantastic and is also no longer fat. As she's no longer fat, she's just lost the foundation of her motivation (to stop fat). As there is no longer any motivation, she no more stays on the diet and discards her exercise regime. She will not be motivated to do whatever she has to stay fit and healthy. During the future she will try looking in the mirror and again from the judgment that she is fat along with the process will start again.
When you are motivated from something that you don't want in everyday life, you tend to focus upon ab muscles thing you don't want and that is what you attract to you. As examples:
- If you constantly inform yourself, 'I don't want to be broke', your focus is upon being broke and that is where your unconscious mind will aim.
- If you constantly inform yourself, "I don't want to be single", your focus is upon being single and that's where your unconscious mind will aim.
Motivation away from what you don't want can motivate you, but it doesn't accomplish that for long and you cannot be sure what results you will achieve. It can offer you a fantastic initial boost of their time, but you can never guarantee your location going to end up as you don't have a firm direction in mind, just a place you would like to get away from. If you use far from motivation in your life, you'll tend to create a number of crises to keep yourself motivated.
If you are using 'towards motivation' you will take action to advance towards your goal and you may achieve them usually.
'Towards' motivation is the best way to motivate yourself. When you are motivated towards what you want, you tend to stay consistently motivated until you achieve your goal (provided you would like it enough).
If you are motivated towards what you look for, you constantly set and achieve goals each time stretching yourself further. By making use of motivation towards what you look for you give yourself a far greater chance of achieving what you look for out of life.
You need to If The Motivation You have Is 'Towards' Or 'Away From' Motivation?
Now that we know that values drive your motivation which motivation can be either towards what you look for or away from everything you don't want. Now it is time for it to review your values to learn whether the underlying motivation for every of your values is:
- towards what you want; or
- away from that which you don't want.
To determine whether the underlying motivation for each and every value is 'towards' or 'away from' contemplate, "Why is that value vital that you me?" then tune in to your self-talk and note everything you say to yourself. The clues as to if you are using towards or from motivation for that value are:
Maybe you are using 'towards' motivation if you:
- talk about what you do want
- don't use comparisons with your explanation (better than, worse than, more than)
You are probably using 'away from' motivation in the event you:
- talk about what you don't want
- make comparisons inside your explanation or use words for example 'better than', 'more than', 'less than', 'best' etc. (These teach you are unhappy with where you currently are)
- use words including 'must', 'need', 'have to', 'got to' etc
As an example, believe that 'money' was your highest value in relation to your career. You then think about, "Why is the value 'compensation' crucial that you me in relation to my career?"
In case your answer is, "Because I want to create a lot of money and reside in luxury", the response would indicate 'towards' motivation with this value.
If your answer is, "Because I don't want to be broke and I have to be able to pay my bills", the response would indicate 'away from' motivation just for this value.
Your chances of achieving goals in relation to 'money' are much greater if you work with towards motivation.
Should you have identified 'away from' motivation regarding any of your values, you can find:
- This area of your life is one that you will experience the most difficulties;
- You will not be achieving the results in the therapy lamp of your life that you might wish; and
- There are unresolved issues to get cleared away and healed with regards to this area of your life prior to deciding to will experience the success you want.
This is wonderful information to have as it identifies areas of your life for you to focus upon.
Difficulty with Motivation
We all experience difficulty with motivation at some point. Those times when you just can't appear to find the desire to do things you know you should. The down sides can arise because:
- You are close to energy. There are some easy things I believe you do when you are feeling 'low' to get your energy back. Remember too that sometimes in life, you'll need and deserve a rest.
- The thing you are aiming towards isn't something you value. (In this instance, question whether you should be exerting your efforts in that direction); or
- You have trouible with your motivation strategy (see below).
When it is your motivation strategy which is causing you challenges, identify which part of the strategy is causing the problem then use one of the following processes to assist you to change it. If you aren't motivated because:
- You feel overwhelmed, break the aim down into smaller steps and do them one-by-one.
- You are only using 'away from' motivation, identify where you stand aiming and focus upon the positive outcomes of attaining it.
- You feel obliged to pursue desire to, either accept the aim is not for you and let it go or focus upon the positive outcomes you're going to get from achieving the goal.
- You are frightened, identify what could go wrong and what you'd do if it did.
If you understand your values, you will understand what motivates you and also why. If you discover regardless if you are using towards or away from motivation in different parts of your life, you will have answers for why some parts of your life are successful and others are not. If you use one of the above techniques to overcome common motivation problems... and you take action... you should be soon on your way success!